I’ll never forget that day.
I was on air… Noon-3PM just like any other day. When the news popped up, Cutter and I immediately began to investigate it’s validity. We had just lost Chris Cornell 2 months prior. We couldn’t be loosing Chester now too. But there it was. Confirmed. I remember staring at it for a moment as the news struck me. As the reality of what was now my responsibility… to break the news to you, on air… struck me. Cutter and I picked a song. I took a deep breath, which did nothing to quell my nerves, and with tears in my throat went on air to break the news. I don’t think I have ever felt so uncomfortable and so lost in front of a microphone.
I don’t remember what I said. I don’t remember what Cutter said. I’m not even sure what song we played… but I remember crying the second I turned the mic off. I remember Cutter and I sitting in the studio, staring at each other in disbelief. Plans of celebrating Chris Cornell’s Birthday for the three-way that day, suddenly felt weird. I’m pretty sure we did it anyway.
The rest of that day is a blur. I know I came home and went for a run to clear my mind. I know I took a bath that night and cried with the heaviness of the day.
Now, here it is 3 years later and I still have no words. I can only be grateful that the loss of Chris and Chester so close together sparked so many beautiful changes. You see… if it wasn’t for these events, Razor would not be such an advocate for Mental Health. Of course we would still advocate, as we always have… but not the way we do now. The Rock Music Industry as a whole would not be as vocal about mental health if it was not for the loss of these two incredible humans.
So whatever you do today… remember one thing. You are important. You’re not going to feel good every single day. And some days are going to really suck. So let those be the days that music washes over you and becomes your therapy.
— Kaytie
